Happy Month of May! Most of you know that this is my favorite month of the year. Not because it’s my birth-month, but because in May, one can really feel that Spring has arrived.
I think it’s no coincidence that Mother’s Day comes in May, since May truly signifies the birth of Spring.
Needless to say, mothers are very important to us all, often THE most important person in our lives. Whether your relationship with mom is/was good, not so good, or really, really, really not good, it is still a key relationship. In one way or another, your relationship with mom will impact your entire life, and many, if not all, of your interpersonal relationships.
My friend Jane is always saying how she thanks her mother for all she’s learned, even though they have shared a very difficult relationship. There is wisdom in that perspective. We should all be thankful for the challenges we endure because, like old-fashioned photographs, we develop from the negative.
I recently had a wonderful session in which a young lady (let’s call her Mary, not her real name) came to me because she was receiving messages from her deceased mom and wanted to see if I could validate what was happening. What I got was that this was one wonderful mother who shared a rare honestly with her children.
There was a beach house that had been passed down from Mary’s grandparents who had borrowed money so that the family would be able to enjoy their summers together. Mary’s mother then passed the beach house to her and sisters but purposefully left out one sister who the mother knew would, because of her personality, create immeasurable problems in the family. Also excluded from the will was Mary’s only brother who was/is a gambler and drinker.
This was a mother who not only knew her children well but had the courage to make sure that the sharing of the beach house, which has now been in the family for generations, would remain a place of enjoyment. I don’t have to tell you how expensive beach property is, and nowadays buying one would be beyond the economic capacity of this extended family to purchase. I am sure Mary’s mom went through much soul searching before deciding to exclude two of her own children from her will for the sake of those that would continue to keep the beach house special, and free of acrimony.
During the session, as I sat there feeling how amazing a woman Mary’s mother was/is, I could not help but focus on the courage it took to exclude two of her own children from her last will and testament. More often than not, in my work, I often see how issues like this are often ignored, and then all the unfinished business causes chaos and splits families apart.
I’ve said it before and will share it a thousand times more – For those of us fortunate enough to possess some material wealth, there are three things we need to have:
- A will. It’s not only about money and property but also about your wishes regarding how you feel things should proceed after you transition. Be wise in whom you name as executor of your will. This should be someone you can trust to honor your wishes.
- Health proxy. Many of us know, or have at least heard about, the nightmare of not having someone appointed to make major decisions when a loved one is in a coma or on life support. Make sure you designate some who is NOT weak of heart. This needs to be someone who will, no matter what, follow your wishes, for example, with a DNR (do not resuscitate).
- Power of attorney. Again, if for some reason you cannot or are unable to make a decision while you are still alive, make sure you appoint someone who will carry out your expressed wishes. If finances are involved, give them the authority to pay your bills, etc. Often this will be the same person you name as the executor of your will, so when the time comes, that person will be familiar with your wishes and economic condition.
Although I connect freely with the Other Side, my work is about the living, as I’ve noted so many times before. For it is we who are left here on Earth, until our time comes, who must process our grief, and figure out how to move on after a loved one crosses over. It’s a challenge! And a time for soul growth. Of course, this may be especially tough for those of you who, this month, will celebrate your first Mother’s Day without your mom. But one thing you can be sure of this: she will be around. Watch for the signs, and trust what you feel and experience. Love never dies, especially a mother’s love.
So, in sum, on this coming Mother’s Day, make sure to celebrate all the mother figures in your life, whether they are alive or crossed over, and whether they are your natural born mothers or someone who has given you that motherly nurturing and loving. This of course includes grandmothers and great grandmothers, etc! Oh, and a reminder for all you husbands out there whose wives are moms-let your wife know how happy you are to be the father (or step-father) of her child or children. Make her feel special because, after all, she is!
One final reminder – never, never, never leave out Mother Earth from your Mother’s Day remembrances. She is the grandest mother of them all, the one who feeds us, houses us, clothes us, and allows us to breathe – while providing so much beauty in the world.
Please note that I will be doing two Mother’s Day events this year. I’m returning to WXLO in Worcester, MA for my 11th year on Friday, May 6, and I will be doing a very special Mother’s Day event in my own city, New York, with fellow medium Thomas John. I’m very excited about both. And, of course, I will again be at the Afterlife Conference in St. Louis on May 12 – 15. I’m so excited to be returning to Kansas City; I’ve been away too long.
Have a marvelous May. I’m so looking forward as always to connecting, spending time, and seeing so many of you again in my travels. As always, new friends are also most welcome!